Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Nice guys finish last

Sometimes I hate it when I'm living on my own . From another perspective, I see it as no one bothers about me. Geez, am I an attention-seeker now? The thing is, I WANT somebody to go all over me, ask me how I'm doing, share my happiness, share my sorrow etc genuinely. Get it, genuinely. Most of the time, people just want to take advantage, which is actually one of my weaknesses as I tend to feel sorry very easily for others and end up hurting myself. Quoted by my superior, 'You are very fragile'. I'm a Pisces, for goodness sake. 

And for years of being independent, I tend to bottle up my feelings because I don't want to hurt others and I don't want others to worry too. Maybe it's a first child's nature, I don't know. So sometimes, people ask me how am I, it's sort of like an auto-pilot-kinda-thing, I'll say, 'Good', when in fact, I am really not okay. Sometimes, you gotta say what's politically-correct, you get what I mean *sigh*

And I hate waiting. I hate wasting time if I have something better to do. I hate wasting 4 years of computer studies just to work at where I am now, I hate wasting 5 years of work dedication just to find out the only way to get to the top is to know how to talk instead of hard work (another weakness), I hate wasting 5 years of commitment just to watch it all go down the drain, I hate wasting days ahead being miserable giving your all to others and you get bullshit in return. I hate being used. 

We get a lot of  'Good things come to those who wait'. Forget it. You got to be selfish sometimes. 

And that one about 'Nice guys finish last'? It's true indeed. So go figure. 

No comments:

Post a Comment